When a funk turns the corner to the blues
I have not been very shy about telling the world that I'm in a February funk. I'm not sure where it crept up from, but I'm feeling this lethargy, this meh, this blah blah blah that I just can't seem to shake. Is it seasonal? Probably. Am I really a bear that just needs to sleep through the winter? Perhaps. Is it just my personality? God I hope not.
Normally, I would just recognize that my energy is low and that there are a host of things I can do to take good care of myself. But here is the worry, and why I am writing it down.
In my lifetime I have suffered from some really serious depressions. The stories I could tell would surprise you and perhaps horrify you. I am one of the lucky ones who gets a technicolor mix of anxiety and depression all wrapped in a blanket of sleepiness. My mental health woes scare the shit out of me, and effect my life in many different ways. I have great doctors who help me balance my brain chemistry and great friends and family who listen to me when I need to talk. Even though I know I am managing my mental health the best I can, in the quiet times, I feel scared and sad. I feel like sleeping until Spring. I don't feel creative or energetic or inspired. This, for me, is the blues.
I'm writing the post because I want people who are also going through this to know that they are not alone. It is extremely common to feel low. It's extremely common to have depression and anxiety. It is extremely common to worry about the aforementioned issues. The most awful part is feeling alone, feeling like everyone else has their shit together and you are the ONE person who doesn't know how to handle their own emotions. This is not the case. I, for one, am right there struggling with you.
Because I have been here before, I know what to do to help myself and I am executing my winter depression emergency exit sequence. I am getting the right medicine. I am doing a lot of yoga (sweet, sweet heaven, I don't know what I would do without yoga and my yoga students). I am meditating. I try to breathe fresh air every day. I am reaching out. Don't you worry about me. I'll come out the other side.
If you are feeling low, perhaps even very, very low, don't be afraid to ask for help. This is a hard time of year, particularly in the Midwest when the gray skies hide the sunshine and the cold keeps us isolated. Know that Spring is coming, and the sun will shine bright upon your face (and mine) sooner than you know.